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by Miimaas
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Language, some dark themes

One Liners Part 1


These are mostly my own lines that I’ve come up with — and hope to actually get a chance to properly use someday — but I was looking at them the other day and thought they'd actually make some really good writing prompts, so I decided to share them, and what better place to do that than a book of random thoughts.

Some of these are from people around me that I’ve been given permission to use/have, and some are from the internet (mostly Pinterest) that I thought were really good and I couldn't find anything about people not wanting them to be used. So just in case, I'm giving a disclaimer now that a few of these aren't mine and all rights go to their original creators. I will try to mark the ones that weren't made by me and any without such markings you can assume were either created by yours truly or it slipped past editing.


If anyone ever asks me to take one out or to give specific credit to them, I will do so. Also, if any of you happen to know the creator of any of these and it isn't marked or says 'unknown' please let me know in the comments and I'll update it as soon as I can. Overall, I just wanted to share these because they were very inspiring to me and have given me some incredible ideas, I don't want anyone to think I'm trying to take credit for anything that isn't mine.




If these inspire you to write something, even if it's just a few more words or a single scene, drop them in the comments!


I never wanted the truth. I wanted a beautiful lie.


Pain is Priceless. People will give anything to be rid of it.


I wouldn’t be suffering if it wasn’t for you.


I can meet anyone’s demands, with demands of my own.


The guilty preach innocence, the corrupt preach morals, and the trustworthy remain silent and act.


Patience is a gift. A gift that costs you nothing. A gift you can give anyone, over and over, and it's value never fades. Have patience, and give it freely.


When you can’t find the light, it’s absence is the next best thing.


You’d be unwise to let go of someone who doesn’t speak. Because when you don’t speak, there’s only one thing left to do. Act.


Who said monsters were the ones to fear?


Who said monsters had to be evil? Who said they were trying to hurt you? Isn’t it more likely they’re just as curious as you?


How to not get caught with your hand in the cookie jar? Take the whole damn jar.


You know how when someone asks "Is there a doctor in the house?" and that's a doctor's cue? "Someone write a book" Is mine.                    Unknown


Fair is for fools.


I don’t fight. I win.


There's a difference between villains and criminals. Criminals don't aim to hurt many, villains aim to hurt all.


Life is cruel, but death is kind.


Do you know why history repeats itself? Because it’s not history. It’s a pattern.


This is no longer the declaration of independence. It’s the declaration of ignorance.


“I understand.” is far more powerful than, “Cheer up.”                    Unknown


If it's not strange it's not normal.


The truly diabolical get what they want by evil means, and make you love them for it.


Not all demons live in Hell.                    Unknown


The only place demons live is inside your head.


You’re not as evil as people think you are.

No. I am much worse.                    Unknown


You have to listen to reason.

But reason is boring. That prick doesn’t know shit about fun.


A Venn diagram of my enemies and my allies would be a circle.                    Unknown(But I'm pretty sure this is something my friend's father said once)


You know, no one bothered me this much when I was dead.


There’s no such thing as a stupid question.

Shall I inform sarcasm it’s outta the job, then?                    Unknown


There’s no such thing as a stupid question.

What’s in mango salsa?

I stand corrected.                    Unknown


You can’t just sit there all day.

Never underestimate my ability to idle. I have done it before, and I shall do so again.


I don’t give a damn.

You give so many damns they’re visible from space.                    Unknown


I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.                    Unknown


Feel like making a deal with the devil?                    Unknown


I’m waiting for mistakes to be made.


I lied to you, why can’t you understand that?                    Unknown


Stop locking me out of my own car.                    Unknown


You’re an idiot. I’m an idiot. We’re the co-presidents of Club Idiot.                    Unknown


I was called a trash monster today. It was the greatest compliment I’ve ever received.                    Unknown


If you’re gonna be the death of me, that’s how I wanna go.                    Unknown


Yes it’s dangerous, that’s why it’s fun.                    Unknown


True evil is, above all things… seductive.                    Unknown


This holy ground burns my feet.

That’s what leather shoes are for.                    Unknown


You believe this is a game, and you may be right. But if you think you can play it better than me, think again.                    Unknown


Business in the front. Knife in the back.                    Unknown


She wore a smile like a loaded gun.                    Unknown


Don’t be mean.

I am mean.                    Unknown


Don’t be mean.

Aw, but it’s the highlight of my life. Don’t take my happiness from me!                    Unknown


You’re the only person I know, who can make silence sarcastic.                    Unknown


I promise I won’t make a pact with a demon.

I don’t completely believe you, but that’s okay.                    Unknown


And in the end, I’ll do it all again.                    Unknown


Excuse me, which level of Hell is this?                    Unknown


Judge if you want. We’re all going to die. I intend to deserve it.                    Unknown


I don’t trust demons, you’re all monsters.

We say the same about humans.                    Unknown


So you’re a human? Like, one hundred percent actual human? I’ve heard scary things about you guys.                    Unknown


It was my grandmother’s. Careful, it’s sharp.                    Unknown


On whatever honor I might have left, I swear I will end you for what you’ve done.

Oh come now, don’t make promises we both know you can’t keep.                    Unknown


I trusted you.

Well then you can’t exactly blame me, can you? It was your mistake.                    Unknown


So...I just realized, ...that I’ve been shot.


Never trust a survivor until you know what they did to survive.                    Unknown


One look in her eyes, and I knew. She did not intend to come back.

So when she did, I knew it was not her.                    Unknown


Oh emotions? I have mixed feelings on those.                    Unknown


Do you like cheese? Cause I'm the cheesiest thing around.                    Unknown


You can try to put out the fires of Hell with the fountain of youth, but one will still last forever.


Forgiveness is earned, but what you've done is never forgotten.


Your head's part of your body, so use it, boy!                    Unknown


I'll be your anchor and you keep me afloat.                    Unknown


I've found that pleasing everyone is impossible but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as Hell.


Have you ever laughed so hard it feels like a blood vessel has burst in your brain?


Your friend's an idiot. What does he think guitar's are doing inside cases?

Lay it down, just don't fucking step on it.


Help me. Keep me on my feet so I can get us through this.                    Unknown


Can I please unsubscribe from the newsletter of your life.                    Unknown


Well, I hope you can shit like a champion cause most of this conversation is gonna be comin’ out of your ass.                    Unknown


So how was your morning?

Well, I defenestratedFlyoutDefenestrate - Throw someone out of a window my alarm clock.

I thought you didn't have an alarm clock?

Not anymore.

(They're implying that a person acted as their alarm today. Hence 'defenestrate' instead of 'threw'.)


We need to idiot-proof this.


The smallest crack can become a chasm.


There is only one time I enjoy math, and that’s when I'm the DM.


Why does this taste like melted snowman?


My mouth tastes like sweaty sock, and I’m not sure how I feel about it.


Why would I want a reset on life? I’ve worked so hard to build something on this foundation.


I accept your apology, but I don't forgive you. Forgiveness is to be earned through effort, not guilt.


A strong woman looks a challenge in the eye and gives it a wink. ‘You’re mine, b*tch.


You either have to play by the rules, or throw out the book.


I never was much of a fan of rainbows after rain. I always preferred a good lightning storm.


Some people prefer rainbows. I prefer storms.


When you spend as much time running away as I do, you get rather good at it.


What are you doing!?

Running away. I’ve got to be good at something, don’t I?


Some people, when they’re evil, don’t you just wanna stab 6 inches of a broadsword into their liver?


So young but with eyes too old for this life.


A spy is of greater use than a canon.


A wise man knows that a spy is more dangerous than just an assassin.


Every success begins with a try.


I’m a priest, not a saint.


Everyone is responsible for their own actions, and their consequences. In the end, no matter who is to blame, someone has to end the cycle.


You flipped everything I worked for on its side— you ruined my life! Why!?

You were boring, so I made you interesting.


Roses are red. Here’s something new. Violets are violet, not fucking blue.                    Unknown


I’m gonna braid his intestines around his liver!


You groveling floor rat.


Just like learning to speak or read, listening is also learned, and some people never did. Funny how they’re not seen as lesser for it.


I’m so salty, the ocean is jealous.

You’re so salty we’re getting sued by the ocean for copyright infringement.


Whoa—! Be careful with that jawline, boy! You’re gonna kill someone.


Hope tastes really good going down. Why do you think we feed our humans with it?

All our stock is exclusively hope-fed.


“Money can’t buy what I want.” Because you're priceless.


"Money can't buy what I want." Because your misery is priceless.


It’s always better to repair a bridge and keep a friend than to find yourself in the river, but sometimes you’ll just have to learn how to swim, and sometimes you’d rather jump off that bridge and risk the fall than stay on it for even one more second.


Words are like sour-patch warheads. Only sweet with the first taste.


Tell me, you’ve met kings both worthy and unworthy of their crowns, but have you ever met a true monster that was unworthy of their title?


No matter what happens, this is not the end of the world. The tide yields to no one; with the right winds, it can always be turned.


A crisis is an opportunity to be seized, like a falling apple. Those who build their reflexes and learn to juggle, are the ones who will get to eat it.


If they had a button that destroys the entire planet and chose to press it, it still wouldn’t change my regard for you.


A lesser evil does not make it good.


A lesser evil does not make it good.

Agreed, but you forbade me from greater evils. I can only soften so much for you, darling. We agreed to meet in the middle, it's time to live up to your end of the bargain, my dear.


Yeah keep telling yourself that.


Never assume that things are as they seem.


Home is where those fuckers ain’t.


It's not that I don't want to be helped. It's that I know I won't be.


It's not that I don't want to be helped, or that I won't be even though some might try. It's that I know no one can.


My heart may be black as oil, but even then, it still shines.


To appease a little snake, you pissed off a tiger.


God this stuff smells like ass.


Oh, you want me to be more colorful? Because that I can do.


It’s either laugh or cry, and I’m too tired to cry.


Sometimes I question what kind of person I am because I seem to embody a vastly different kind of person on a near day to day basis; But then I remember, I'm an eccentric web novelist, that is my character.


Apparently, rock bottom has a basement.


I’m smiling on the outside but yelling son of a b*tch on the inside.


She’s weak to that stuff; To the comforts of home, to the comforts of childhood. But aren’t we all?


I can't tell if I want to be the best, just need some rest, just bored to death, just sick in the head, or really want to die.

This is how I'm gonna live my life. To die or not to die.


Well aren’t you a happy pill smothered in cocaine.                    Unknown


Because I'm dead inside and compensating with humor.

The darker it is and the more sarcasm it has to bite with, the better.


Only people who aren’t worried about where their next meal is coming from can say ‘honor is more important than money’.


I need air support cause I'm f***king drowning.


I don’t feel bad about eating lots of sugar because cheesecake is healthier than crystal meth.                    Unknown


What are you gonna do when that happens?

*chipper and unconcerned* Die I suppose. That’s usually what happens when one fails to survive.


Have you ever tried to poison a tin of canned tuna? It’s kind of like that.


If getting vengeance makes me the bad guy, then baby call me a super villain.


I can’t handle reality without my escape.


My grip of reality is… loose. My head is hardly ever anywhere near the ground and that’s just how I like it. Is that going to be a problem?

Not in the slightest. The thing about stars is that they are beautiful because they are far away. So, no. I don’t have a problem. On the contrary, it’s one of many things that I love most about you. You wouldn’t look like you without this faraway look in your eyes.


I’m a private person. My business is none of anyone else’s unless I choose to divulge it.


It’s less about knowing what is there, and more about noticing what isn’t.


I’m a devil in somebody’s mythology.                    My friend's father September of 2020


Hold your tongue! I will kill you where you stand!

Then do it! If you’re too p***y to do it yourself then hand me that knife and I’ll do it for you. Just be aware, my services don’t come for free. If you want me to do the dirty work for you, I’ll be taking you with me for compensation.


I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.                    Unknown


Our kid must’ve gotten his brain from you, I still have mine.                    Unknown


I went through my dirty joke phase just like everybody else. Except mine never stopped.

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